‘Twas the night before demolition


‘Twas the night before demolition, when all thro’ the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse.
The cabinets were chose by myself with care,
In hopes that Calyx Builds soon would be there.
The workers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of tape measures danc’d in their heads;
And George in his Harley’s shirt, and Bob’s cat in his lap,
Had just settled their brains for a predemo nap-
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the old windows I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters, whoops that’s a change order and more cash.
The dumpster in the driveway was covered in snow,
Was ready for the demolition to start tomorrow;
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a confused looking carpenter riding a skid steer,
With a little old tool belt, ladder and yardstick,
I knew in a moment I must help him quick.
More rapid than a hemi pickup, down the stairs I came,
Once I arrived he appeared to be sleep walking and shouting by name:
“Now! Daniel, now! Shawn, now! Steven, and Manny,
“On! Jason, on! Chris, on! Jeffrey and Mikey;
“To the start of the foundation! to insulating the kneewall!
“Now demo away! demo away! demo away all!”
I went up to him before he started to walk into my home,
With a bucket full of tools – and some spray foam;
It was George Jr. to my surprise,
And looked at me with a twinkle in his eyes;
He was dress’d all in Calyx gear, from his hat to his boot,
His prepared meals were ready to eat along with some fruit;
I tried to wake him from his sleep spell with a smack,
But he kept walking past me without looking back.
His tools dropped to the floor, his blueprint all laid out,
I waited to see how this would turnout;
Without much ado the demolition began,
He was thrashing around looking like a madman.
And in the middle of the chalky, plastery smoke
George suddenly stopped and smiled, what a strange bloke!
He turned ‘round and cleaned up his tools ever so neatly:
I moved out of his way but I didn’t have to do it discreetly.
And I laugh’d when I saw him finally cease;
He’d finished almost everything, what a great start to his masterpiece.
George picked up his tools and made his way to the front door,
I followed him out and watched him from the ground floor.
He sprung to his skid steer, which was idling to make moves,
And away he rode off, hoping Calyx Builds approves:
But I heard him exclaim, as he went out of sight-
Happy demolition to all, and to all a good night.